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But Did We Die?

Clearly no one died. This is a blog post Not an obituary. But on this particular day we did start to wonder if we might die. I also thought we might break up.


Vacation was planned. Food packed. Tents loaded. Pilot was loaded down. So off we went... to work. As paramedics we we able to work a lot of hours at once and then be off work for a long time. So we headed to work for 48 hours. Both scheduled on busy 911 ambulances that would likely see more than 20 patients in these 48 hours. And this 2 day shift did not disappoint. We were awake almost all of it. When the shift came to an end we went home. Pawned the children off on their grandparents. We finished loading the car, cleaned the house (because you DO NOT leave a dirty house), and laid down. No one slept but we felt good about the fact we had rested. Plus we had been awake longer. This was nothing. (When you justify it to yourself you are probably wrong)

So two very confident but clearly not smart adults get up, straighten up the bed, and head to dinner with the family. Over dinner my dad said “if y’all survive this trip y’all should get married. It’s meant to be.“ This now seems like another ignored red flag. When dinner wraps up we change 4 kids (Morgan- 7, Mya- 6, Avery-5 and Nathan-4) into Jammies and set out on a 3 week camping, car tripping adventure. We had theorized that is we started the trip at night the longest leg (crossing the whole state of Texas) would be done while the children slept. If you have not driven across Texas do not underestimate it. HOURS OF NOTHING. This way the kids would wake up in New Mexico and the fun can start. And it worked perfectly. But for those of you counting we have now been awake 3 days. But hey. Sleep when you die right? We take the kids to Carlsbad Caverns. We hike them down into the bottom, assuring them the whole way because bats. Then we hike them out. Then off to a wild life rescue. Which is a self guided walk. Much like a zoo. Then we make camp at a local state park. (FYI N.M. State parks will email you the rest of your life after one night with them). We set up tents, air mattresses, sleeping bags, built a fire, cooked dinner, cleaned out the car, and finally.....to bed. HALLALUJAH! The kids are beat so they pass out. But the hubby and I are struggling. We are exhausted. And we are hurting. And we’ve been staying awake on adrem alone which is hard to just turn off. So enter bad idea. We decided we should just take Benadryl to help us sleep. Clearly this was before we were oily. I recall taking 75mg of Benadryl and I think he took more. And sleep we did. From 9pm till midnight. And then the rain. And I mean RAIN! We wake up with the should be vertical tent wall touching our faces. Thank you wind. Everyone and everything was wet. The tent was holding 2-3 inches of water. Little Nathan didn’t weigh enough to hold his air mattress down. He was floating around the tent. We got up. Loaded 4 wet kids in the car. Changed them into dry clothes and drove to a hotel. We would come back in the morning for the gear. Hahaha. Joke was on us. We could not find a hotel room for any amount of money. I mean we checked the higher end ones we normally don’t go to and the lower end ones that rent by the hour and may or may not came with a hooker. Nada. Zip. No vacancy. Back to camp. We packed wet gear in trash bags. Loaded the car. Drove to the park bathroom and went in the girls restroom. There we sat on a bench and discussed our future. Arguably this was a horrible time for anything concerning the future. We were on day 4 of awake and high on Benadryl. Finally we agreed we still loved each other and still wanted to get our kids to Yellowstone. So we decided to continue north. We would stop at every hotel until we could sleep. Then we would regroup. Well thanks to the new pipeline at noon that day we had still not found a hotel room. We did find a washateria to wash and dry 6 sleeping bags and everyone’s Jammies. We also found out what dad was shaking his head at us for. We learned that one day of vacation lost to sleep before we leave the house is worth it.

What we didn’t learn but should have is that rain is going to happen. One day you will wake up to your 4 year old floating past you while sound asleep. And that’s not cool. But it’s not a reflection of us. We don’t have to question if we have made a huge mistake in loving each other while standing in the rain high on Benadryl. It’s ok to laugh. It’s ok to say ”This sucks and I still wouldn’t want to be anywhere else” We keep going around and around with this lesson. We aren’t bad people. We don’t deserve it. Sometimes it just rains. It’s called life. For those still counting we made it to Mesa Verde National Park. We dried the tent and mattresses in the sun. We showered. We ate. And everyone was asleep by 5pm. No Benadryl. No rain. And no breaking up or turning back. And yes, we did make it to Yellowstone.



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